What to do when you are sick?

Waking up a week ago to the day I found myself staring up at the ceiling of my bedroom at 6:00 in the morning trying to decide whether I would get up and go to the gym or if I should stay in for another couple hours and get rest after a poor nights sleep and NyQuill induced sleep, or should I get up and go to the gym and risk having hallucinations with gym fairies and three-legged unicorns. I went with the unicorns. Because unicorns! Duh! Actually, I went to the gym under the guise that it may help me stave off sickness and that I promised myself I would do so. Bad decision. It wasn’t just that Friday, rain Armageddon day in California, didn’t provide me the kind of rest I would need to get better. It was my working weekend.

So I spent the next two days working, and as you may have read, I spent the next day lounging around in bed all day watching some Magician series on Netflix. (I can’t tell whether it was good or whether I was delusional. Never ask me to review anything while I’m sick. Bad things happen.) I suppose you could say I got better, marginally. But I was in the midst of my coughing up a lung a morning marathon. If Jerry Lewis had only used me for his telethons he would have raked in the dough. Would I get to charge per the cough? Hmmm….

For those of you who have had the pleasure of coughing like that, along with the coughing comes spitting. Because if your cough is productive it produces stuff that is green, or yellow, or brown, or… My daughter called it a rainbow of phlegm. Maybe the rainbow all goes with the general green and yellow hue, and maybe some colors you can’t even begin to describe. Or, for those who want a more adult description, let’s call the title for the book to describe my mornings, “50 Shades of Phlegm.” And my mornings were as spectacular as the book. (Whoever thought they should make fan fiction from Twilight should be shunned.)

Trash Can Paper Mache Anyone?

So Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday were filled with coughing. And my trashcan was filled with tons of tissue like I had decided to make a paper mache trash can. So you can imagine what I thought of going to the gym. And I am sure the gyms would have appreciated me. I admit that I was starting to feel better. But with colds, by the time I am feeling better, I’m sounding like I should be one of those early patients at a doctors office, the ones who come early to avoid exposing all of the other patients to your illness. And I had living proof of what going to the gym feeling the way I did would do to me. Instead of 50 Shades of Phlegm, I would be 50 Shades of David.

So another week has gone by and I am supposed to be talking about what I did to help out my fitness. And I did a ton. Wait! Ignore the last few paragraphs. I swear! I was fitness guru this week. They will hire me to teach Zumba classes at the gym before I know it. My cell phone will ring any moment. Planet Fitness doesn’t do Zumba classes? Darn!

Sometimes quitting while you are ahead doesn’t mean quitting 

Actually, the one thing I learned from this whole week is that sometimes your body is telling you that you need to quit while you are ahead. So we should listen to our body when it’s telling us that we have had enough. And I wasn’t listening last Thursday. So I had a body screaming marathon this last weekend. I heard tons of, “No! Stop! Don’t you dare!” And by the time Monday came I had to listen.

New Plan or Old Plan 2.0?

And you know what? My body was actually nice to me and I lost half a pound. How did I do it? Fitness! Duh!
So I would write a new plan for this next week to be hip and with it. But I won’t because I’m not going to remake the wheel. And I had a good plan for last week. As I followed none of it, I’ll do it again. Seriously! Actually, my goal this week is to do it all for real. And sometime tomorrow morning, or today for those of you in Siberia, I will be at the gym getting back to my routine. Because if I don’t get right back to it, I will quit.

This time I will do it all. (What’s all that garlic you say? To keep away vampires of course. And colds!) I hope you are doing well on your journey. What kinds of things do you do when your plans derail? I would love to hear from any of you. And tomorrow morning, or today by now, I will be at the gym, kicking off another session of my fitness routine. (Hope the today’s and tomorrow’s don’t confuse you, Siberian people.)

This is me, signing off.

David Elliott, Single Dad’s Guide to Life

Week 0 : Not Another Fitness Blog

First Week : Week One

Second Week : Two Down. Nineteen to go.